Especially formulated diet designed to help women cope with the stress that builds during the day:
Breakfast
1 grapefruit
1 slice whole wheat toast
1 cup skim milk
Lunch
1 small portion lean, steamed chicken
1 cup spinach
1 cup herbal tea
1 Hershey's kiss
Afternoon Snack
The rest of the Hershey Kisses in the bag
1 tub of Hagen-Daaz ice cream with chocolate chips
Dinner
4 glasses of wine (red or white)
2 loaves garlic bread
1 family size supreme pizza
3 Snickers Bars
Late Night Snack
1 whole Sarah Lee cheesecake (eaten directly from the freezer)
Remember: Stressed spelled backwards is desserts.
Tuesday, June 10, 2008
Monday, May 5, 2008
Calories That Don't Count
I have found from a lot of good research that the following foods and situations have no calories to speak of. You can eat all you want with a clear conscience!
Food On Foot - All food eaten while standing has no calories. Exactly why is not clear but the current theory relates to gravity. The calories apparently bypass the stomach flowing directly down the legs, and through the soles of the feet into the floor, like electricity. Walking appears to accelerate this process, so that an ice cream bar or hot dog eaten at the state fair actually has a calorie deficit. 
Uneven Edges - Pies and cakes should be cut neatly, in even wedges or slices. If not, the responsibility falls on the person putting them away to "straighten up the edges" by slicing away the offending irregularities, which have no calories when eaten. 
Balanced Food - If you drink a diet soda with a candy bar, they cancel each other out.
Food On Toothpicks - Sausage, cocktail franks, cheese, and crackers are all fattening unless impaled on frilled toothpicks. The insertion of a sharp object allows the calories to leak out the bottom.
Charitable Foods - Girl Scout cookies, bake-sale cakes, ice cream socials, and church gatherings all have a religious dispensation from calories.
Custom-Made Food - Anything somebody makes "just for you" must be eaten regardless of the calories, because to do otherwise would be uncaring and insensitive. Your kind intentions will not go unrewarded.
Uneven Edges - Pies and cakes should be cut neatly, in even wedges or slices. If not, the responsibility falls on the person putting them away to "straighten up the edges" by slicing away the offending irregularities, which have no calories when eaten. Balanced Food - If you drink a diet soda with a candy bar, they cancel each other out.Food On Toothpicks - Sausage, cocktail franks, cheese, and crackers are all fattening unless impaled on frilled toothpicks. The insertion of a sharp object allows the calories to leak out the bottom.
Charitable Foods - Girl Scout cookies, bake-sale cakes, ice cream socials, and church gatherings all have a religious dispensation from calories.Custom-Made Food - Anything somebody makes "just for you" must be eaten regardless of the calories, because to do otherwise would be uncaring and insensitive. Your kind intentions will not go unrewarded.
Eating with Girlfriends - If you are out to lunch, or eating any other food, with girlfriends than of course there are no calories.
Out of Town Eating - Go ahead add a slice of cheesecake to the end of a meal, If you are out of town the calories can't travel home with you.
Thursday, May 1, 2008
Sin of the Day
Today it is NOON and I have TONS of healthy food in my house. . . What do I go for a bowl of Delicious home made Mac N Cheese
and finish off with about 10 Cookies N Cream Hershey Kisses
Do you need to Confess???
and finish off with about 10 Cookies N Cream Hershey Kisses
Please don't let me feel alone! Did anyone else committ any FOOD SINS today?
I PROMISE I will be good the rest of today.
Do you need to Confess???
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